Do you remember when you first left God? When you believed you stood all alone?
Do you remember the price you had to pay for doing so?
I remember the subtle hints that I ignored.
First, there was a devastating situation that I thought I had to go through on my own.
I believed that no one could possibly know how I felt. Who could possibly know how much it hurt.
When or if I tried to discuss the matter with my loved ones, I didn’t accept their advice.
They were too old. Too spiritual. Too lame. Too Dumb. Too something. They just didn’t know nothing about nothing.
I believed they were clueless. They had never experienced what I was dealing with and couldn’t possible understand.
Second, I began to look around in my circle of acquaintances to find someone to commiserate with.
I looked for and gravitated toward someone who would validate my feelings of “It’s me against the world.”
Finding others who were as hurt and angry and broken as I, who echoed my sentiments and resentments, they became my source of support. I thought they could relate to my experience. We could get through the madness together.
Third, I sought a antidote for my pain. It could have been drugs or alcohol, sex or pills; anything that I could physically hold on to, to help make it through the day.
Fourth, I kept my family at a considerable distance. Deep down inside, I knew they loved me.
But it was’nt enough. I didn’t want them to know how far I had strayed from the values and principles I learned as a child.
I no longer believed as they did. The world was not a good place. Only the strong survived. I had to fight my way through.
Together with my cronies ….
who were wise to the ways of the world and was fighting what I thought was the same fight;
I begin to formulate my own strategies to make it because I thought I was so smart. I thought I had all the answers.
Fifth, as I begin to sink lower in the abyss of life; I begin to question the nature of God.
He couldn’t possibly love me because if He did he would have stepped in and untangled the mess of my life. He would have changed my situation. He would have stopped the hurt and pain. He would punish all those people who hurt me and did me wrong.
If He didn’t love me no one else could.
Six, as my journey of deception completed its cycle; I began to hate who I had become.
Seven, I felt empty, unable to feel for anyone or anything.
Satan thought he won.
But God said…
Someone stood in the gap.
Someone was praying for me. Someone was interceding on my behalf. Someone told me God loved me.
Someone who would not give up on me. Someone who would not give up the fight.
Someone stood by me through it all.
Someone clothed with the helmet of salvation and the breast-plate of righteousness. Someone whose loins were strong with the truth. Someone who held the sword of the spirit in one hand and the shield of faith in the other.
Someone whose feet remained steadfast, forging on until the victory of peace was won. For me.
Covered by the blood….
Now, I can stand for you.
I will stand for you.
Now I have power to tread on serpents. I have power over the enemy of your soul.
I stand for you.
I will fight for you.
Don’t you worry. God already told me, I WON!!!
Walk with me in victory!
I’ll hold your hand……
because I stand for you!!!
So being affectionately desirous of you, we were willing to have imparted unto you, not the gospel of God only, but also our own souls, because ye were dear unto us. 1 Thessalonians 2 – 8
For ye are our glory and joy 1 Thessalonians 2 – 20
- Today’s grief may just possibly be tomorrow’s joy if U look for the good in the situation! (iaminspiration2u.wordpress.com)